Just Let Go of the Shore, Jump from the Life Raft, Leap into Me.

Walked Away from All That Had Become my Life
to Feel Something, Experience Something
that Did Not Exist....

Running, Driving, Walking Miles Upon Miles
looking for that in Me which I had lost...

a Year has Almost Come to Past..
and Conclusions Lay Boldly at me Feet..

I don't want to believe that what I Crave
Does Not exist....

so Certain in what is me, what I want, Who I am..
so Why the Launch, why the Search, why the Crave
to awaken a part of me that had been.. well
Surviving Slumber...

Why not Just stay quietly n y Bed,
in My Illusion.. in my Things, my Movies,
my Books, my House, My Cars and just Live
the Life So Gracefully Handed to me..

Why would I head out in Search of Me with a Carload,
then a Back Pack Load, then a Small Truck Load...
and Why One Foot in Front of the Other
Keep Walking to Feel, to Make Others Smile
to Tell them What I see even if they may not want to hear it...

I sit in Alone..
I am good alone.. I like alone..
however not always and not like this..

Craving So Much,
Much of What I Won't Let in..

Wanting to Feel Something..
I may Never Feel Again..

It is as if I am Lucid Dream,
walking around in a Life Not mine...
after Now almost a year has past and well ..
the Leap into Me.. Took me Downstream so far
I am cretainly unfamiliar with the Territory,
thing is Me.. well I am still here in me..

Loving the Same Things
Wanting the same Things..
Good at the same things..

and Funny..
Much of the Me I know is the Same Me
I was at 12 Years Old.

That in Which I Crave May Not Exist
and that Jagged Pill a bit hard to Swallow indeed,
however for me a longing for "Home" has always sat in me
and well I guess looking for that in Prayer, in Beauty and the
Arms of an Illusion is just .. well a Bit off Trail...

So Back to the Dream..
I am Still Dreaming Right?